Misunderstandings

A common problem among development workers all over the world is misunderstandings between the outside workers and the native people being helped. These misunderstandings take many forms, such as: language barriers, misinterpretation of a problem, forcing an outside solution that may be unnecessary, explaining concepts that are above the native's level of reasoning, ineffectively working with the illiterate, and disrespecting a people because of ignorance of their cultural norms and values. Though I have already experienced multiple of these types of misunderstandings, my greatest number have involved language barriers.

The community I live in speaks 2 main languages: Spanish and Ngobere. I state these as both main languages because almost every single person knows both languages well enough to carry on an intermediate-level conversation (some of the older women can only carry on a basic-level conversation in Spanish). Also, both of these languages are used everyday; it is not as if the people have the knowledge of one language but rarely use it. Additionally, the Spanish spoken in my community is often "relaxed" meaning they have heavily adopted the Caribbean Spanish habit of dropping the ending "s" on the "tu" and "nosotros" conjugations of verbs (ex. "tu va" and "vamo"). The other adaptation that is very prevalent is the use of "ao" instead of the full "ado" on the endings of words (ex. "pescao" instead of "pescado", "cuidao" instead of "cuidado").

Since entering the community, my language learning has been relatively slow. In my defense, I was basically learning a whole new way of life, diet, people, climate, and still trying to perform my new job as a development worker observing the communiy and learning about their problems. Then add on top of that learning 2 basically new languages. Needless to say, there were many language-based misunderstandings in the beginning (and still are today!). I'll recap a few to give you an idea of the difficulties that I have experienced.

Let me preface these stories with a few more pieces of information. Sometimes the misunderstandings may appear to be language-based but really it is a problem of assumptions being made by people with different cultures. For instance, in America, if you go to your neighbor's house (non-family member), you always wait to be invited in. Even if the person has the door open but is working somewhere inside, you will probably shout and ask permission to enter. Even if you have visited this person multiple times, you still feel that you need permission to enter their home. This shows how much we, as Americans, value our privacy. Well here in the good 'ole campo (countryside) in Panama, the rules seem to be that once that neighbor has invited you to enter once, you can use that open door (literal) as an invitation to enter at any time. So if I am working away at something inside my house and I have the door open to let the breeze in, using my American values I would assume that anyone who comes over would wait for me to get to the door before entering. But I would be very wrong because I would soon see my visitor strolling right in and taking a seat on the chair next to me. So the following stories may not be solely a misunderstanding of language, but also a pre-formed cultural assumption in our minds of how the other person will act in a given situation.

This first example happened just a few days ago. I walked up to a neighbor's house and saw a beautiful new table that someone had made by hand. The legs were intricately carved and the top was smooth and rounded on the corners. The following conversation is what I understood from my end (remember - with my own assumptions at play):
Me: "Who made this beautiful table?"
Lady: "My husband."
Me: "Is it for sell?"
Lady: "Yes."
Me: "How much?"
Lady: "$35."
Me: "I want it but I already have a table top and posts to make my own table."
Lady: "Well my husband can take those pieces and sell you this for $10."
Me: "Sounds like a deal! Tell him to come to my house later to get the pieces."

Later, he comes by and takes the table top, 2 leg posts, and my $10. He says he still needs to paint the table but I tell him I like it unpainted. He says he can bring it to my house in two days.

The following day I decide to round up some neighborhood boys to help me bring the table to my house. I knew it was already finished since I told him not to paint it and us coming to get it would save him the trouble of hauling it to my house. I get to the house and my table isn't there.
Me: "Where is my table?"
Lady: "It's not done yet. My husband told you he would finish it by tomorrow afternoon."
Me: "But it was finished. What else still has to be done?"
Lady: "The legs still have to be carved."
She shows me one of the legs and I realize it is different from the ones on the other table. That's when it clicked and I understood the misunderstanding.
Me: "But what happened to the table that was right here? That's the one I bought."
Lady: "It's at my grandfather's house already."
Me: "So your husband is making me a new table out of the wood that I gave him?"
Lady: "Yes and he is using his own wood too. That's why it's a cheaper price."

Well alright then. Our words weren't matching up because our assumptions were getting in the way. Now I know that no one makes furniture without an order already placed. So if I see a finished piece of furniture, it already belongs to somebody. That's why the wife I was talking to skipped over the fact that the table I was looking at and that I intended to buy was already sold. She didn't specifically say, "he will need to build you a new one" because it was assumed that I realized this. But regardless, now I have a beautiful handcrafted table that only cost about $30 with materials and labor!

There are a lot of assumptions about money that I am still figuring out. The following two stories are examples of differing cultural assumptions of how to handle money.

I brought back some small bags of beads from the city because the women who make jewelry asked for some. As soon as I told one or two people that I had some beads, I quickly realized that the demand was greater than my supply. However, many women did not have the money to pay for them that day. I had the same conversation with two different women.
Lady: "Oh I really need these beads but I don't have the money ($0.30) on me right now. Can I take these and pay you back later?"
Me: "No because I might forget and other women might come who have the money so it is only fair that they have the opportunity to buy."
Lady: "Oh, well can you just set these aside for me and I'll bring you the money tomorrow?"
Me: "No because if someone else comes with money I'm going to sell it to her."
Lady: "Ok." (as she starts to put the bag in her purse)
Me: "No, I'm going to keep these here and when you bring the money, I'll sell it to you if it's still here."

Later that day I end up selling it to someone else. The next day, the same lady comes back and says she has the money to pay for her beads.
Me: "I'm sorry but I already sold them."
Lady: "But I thought you were savings them for me."
Me: "No I said I would sell them to whoever had the money."
Lady: "Oh man I really wanted them."

This story definitely makes me look like the bad guy, but my American mindset is still obviously at work. In my mind, I know there are other women who have the money and are ready to pay on the spot. I don't know for sure if this other woman will have the money tomorrow or even a week from now. My trust level is naturally lower (being an American). Let me tell the other story where I learned more of what was probably going on in the other lady's mind.

I mentioned to one of the ladies in the community that makes artisan goods that I really wanted to buy one of her necklaces for my mom, but I didn't have enough money yet. About a month later, I was visiting at her house and we started talking about the artisan goods fair that she will take her goods to. She asked if I still wanted to buy the necklace and I told her yes but I still don't have enough money saved up. She said that was fine, that I could go ahead and take it with me and pay her later. I told her I didn't know when "later" would be so I would rather her hold onto it so I don't forget about my debt to her. She said it didn't matter whether I paid her next month or next year, I could take it if I wanted to. I convinced her to hold onto it, but I learned a valuable lesson from this exchange.

First of all, they have a lot of trust with on another. It's very common for someone to have a debt outstanding for a long time. I understand this behavior amongst themselves, but I was surprised that they extended the same trust to me. In my mind, I hate having a debt outstanding with them because I understand the opportunity cost of them not having the money. Also, I was raised in a culture where common debt is bad. So the whole idea of me taking her product and not paying for it was against everything my culture teaches.

Secondly, they are a very generous people. They often give without expecting anything in return (especially so with food). I imagine many debts go without being paid (at least in monetary terms) and no one holds grudges about this.

So to go back to the first story, I can understand better why she wanted to take the beads and pay me back later and also why she alternatively suggested I save them for her and she will come back and pay me when she has the money. It's all about confianza (trust) and generosity which I thought I had a lot of until I met these people who appear to be the developers of these concepts. I need to brush up on teachings of generosity in Proverbs 11:25, 22:9, Paul's teachings in 2 Cor 9:6, Jesus' teaching in Luke 6:38, Moses' teaching in Deut 15:7. And to sum it all up, Rom 12:9-21 and 13:9-10.

My last example involves interesting different cultural assumptions that I am still trying to figure out. I often like to walk on the beach for exercise. It just so happens that the beach I like to walk on is home to a male Peace Corps volunter (as well as a community of natives). The conversation usually goes like this as I'm walking towards the beach:
Native: "Where are you going?"
Me: "I'm going to walk on the beach."
Native: "Oh to go see Sili."
Me: "Well no, for exercise. Though I might run into him and chat."

This simple conversation is littered with cultural assumptions and differences! Think about it like this - in the US, if we say we're going to talk a walk down the street, we immediately assume it's for exercise or to get out and enjoy the nice weather, even if I happen to pass a friend's house along the way. In these communities, exercising for the purpose of exercising is not common. Exercising for the purpose of visiting people is common.

Also, this is a great example of how indirect communication breeds a population of sarcastic dirty-minded people. In America, if I were going to see my friend down the street, I would directly say that is my intent. But Panamanians prefer to speak indirectly in order to leave much implied or to the imagination. So when I say I'm going for a walk on the beach, their brains start thinking of all the reasons why I might be taking a walk on the beach, instead of just taking it at face value, that I really am just walking on the beach.

The last cultural assumption I can pull from this is the fact that single young women are very rare. It is assumed that every woman over 20 needs to have a man and children. So the fact that I don't have these leads many women to tease me about going to see Sili in order to fix my problems of not have a man nor children. I don't think the teasing is really serious, but I know the thought crosses their minds. I have told them that I am here to work (not to find a husband and get pregnant) and Sili has a girlfriend who has visited our communities and met many people. All of this is just head knowledge though. From their understanding of the way life works, a woman's role is to keep house and have babies and just because a man has a woman in one community doesn't mean he isn't sleeping with a woman in another community (especially if it is in another country!). So they just absolutely can't understand singleness nor fidelity.